Wednesday, February 8, 2012

thoughts about life

well i spilled the beans yesterday.
i am pregnant.
only 7 weeks 2 days to be exact.
many may say i'm silly for saying something so early.
a lot of people wait until the second trimester...
the magical 12 week mark.
for some that is the road they want to take.
i don't judge them or think weird of them for waiting.

this is my 6th pregnancy.
i have 3 living children.
one pregnancy ended with an early miscarriage,
6 months ago to be exact.
the other pregnancy... ended at 23 weeks

So where am i going with all of this?
hang in there, it may get confusing before it gets a little clearer!

the question for me is...
am i scared about this pregnancy?
do i dwell on this?

i have read many a blogs stating how they are scared to get attached to the pregnancy
in case anything happens... they don't want to talk about it or acknowledge it all that much.
that is totally their opinion and right.
i respect that and can relate.
however, i think that no matter how much you distance youself or choose not to get excited about the little things you are robbing yourself of the joy that God has given you in that little miracle.
because lets face it... know matter how much you "distance" yourself, you're already attached!

as a mother to 3 children.
i also can find myself in the anxiety state of mind of the, "what if's..."
i love these three little kids of mine and would be devastated if anything happened to them!
do i worry about my kids and their safety?
sure. probably more than i should.
do i dwell on the what if's.
no (well we all have our moments, but for the most part i don't dwell on them!).
we are robbed so much joy if we dwell on the, "what if's..." of life.
God did not want us to be worry warts...

Philippians 4:6

Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. 
worry, fear, anxiety is not from God... it is from the enemy.

as i'm typing this a friend many miles away is laying her 6 year old little boy to rest!
life isn't fair, nor are we guaranteed how much time we have here on earth!

so i say all of this because whether i have a miscarriage or someone i hold dear passes away.
they are both a gift from God.
so i am going to choose to celebrate this life today and not hold back!

Tuesday, February 7, 2012

MIA for a reason

This is the #1 reason I have been MIA on this here ol' blog.
I have been feeling sick up to my eyeballs and sooooooo tired!
At first thought the doctor thought I was having twins due to a
really high HCG level.
There is only one heartbeat! phew!

This is also why I haven't been posting on Weigh in Wednesdays :)
I know some of you lovely ladies can keep up the workouts during pregnancy.
They are off limits for me!
Too dangerous.
I am only 7 weeks along.
Some always wait to share the news that they are pregnant til the scary part has passed.
I understand that.
For me with my history... I love having any extra prayers!

Right now I am counting down the minutes to bedtime! 
That's the only time I don't feel like I'm going to throw up!
Unless I am getting up to go to the bathroom ;)

What does all this mean for the shop you may ask?
Well I am going to have to slow down the production of some things.
However, I am looking into the very likely hood of doing some designs for some party supplies.
Invitations, thank yous, announcements, stationary.... that sort of thing.